Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

"Witherirons; just a word everyone should know.  I like that word...that's really the only reason why I'm going over this."


"Given the infinite amount of time I don't have..."


"Little known fact: when something dies, it stops eating and breathing."


(We were talking about secondary protein structure and Dr. H said "pleated sheet" however, some people thought he said, "bleated sheep") 


"No, it is not a 'bleated sheep.' It does not go bahhhhh, and there is no manger here." 

Dr. Hutchison Advice Column of the Day!

Some valuable life lessons from Dr. Hutchison:

"If you ever feel tempted to dump fingernail polish remover on something very hot, don't do it." 


"If you ever decide to become an evil mastermind, don't attack a chemistry lab. We basically just sit around and dream of ways to use our chemicals to blow things up."


"It would be very wise of you to come to chemistry on Monday (the last day of class). Very wise...because you never know when you might have a pop quiz."

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

(Talking about the accuracy of Carbon dating.)

"Plus or minus 1,000,000,000 years? Eh, what's that between friends?!"

(Referring to figuring out which chemical was the limiting reagent--essentially, the first chemical to run out) 

"Just imagine a bunch of furry little eyeless rodents all lined up at the starting line and some of them are labeled 'Au' while others are labeled 'H2O.' Now, start the reaction. The race of the moles is on!"

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

"Skunk scent is made up of ethers--I used these in my graduate research to run experiments.  I actually exhausted all the skunk scent on the market in the US. I couldn't buy anymore because no one had it, so my friend suggested I start a skunk farm."




"So how do we name an amine? We shall call it Fred!"

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

"Next we are going to study Markovnikov's rule. Isn't that just a fun name to say? Mar-KOV-ni-kov! You know, I wanted to name my firstborn son Markovnikov. But then, I got married and that idea went out the window VERY quickly."


"I always felt funny coming out of the lab storage closet with two large jugs of 200-proof alcohol."

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

"The molecules are like Kindergardeners. They buzz around wildly and run into each other. Then, when they run into each other, they might switch coats. Just like molecules exchange valence electrons!"

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

"There are a bewildering number of different units used to express concentration. Most of them are fairly useful, but weight/volume percent is just evil."

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

"When I worked at the library during college, I actually had a whole plan worked out for how we would defend the library if we were attacked by terrorists."

It is always comforting to know that in the face terrorism, we have Dr. Hutchison to protect us!

Dr. Hutchison Quotes of the Day!

Allow me to preface these quotes by saying that I walked into class that day and the slide on the screen read, "Applications: Dating." Needless to say, I knew this would be an interesting day in chemistry class.

Photo curtesy of Becca Mattison©

"He's an igneous rock. That means you can date him."


(Don't worry, he was referring to Carbon dating both in this quote and on the slide I mentioned).

"If you think about architectural history--of which I know nothing--you will find that..." 

"Aaaak, we're all going to die!" 

(Talking about how we were going to do a radiation lab next week.)

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the Day!

"Beta particles are technically called negatrons, but negatron kind of sounds like an evil robot, so we never use it."




"I heard some students in the Gen Chem lab call a Buret a 'bur-ay.' I had to resist the urge to say something! I just had to keep reminding myself, 'They're not even my students...just walk away....walk away.'"

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the day!

"I did an experiment yesterday in the lab. Wow, imagine that! An experiment in the lab."

"It looks like electron, tastes like an electron...but it's not an electron."

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the day!

"My little molecules." (yes, I believe he was referring to us.)

Dr. Hutchison Quote of the day!

I have a chemistry professor named Dr. Hutchison. He is a wonderful teacher and chemist, but in addition to these accomplishments, I believe he possess one other talent: a comedian. Thus, I have decided to post his most famously funny quotes.

"I guess I shouldn't be telling you about this. But then again, you'll be prepared if terrorists ever come and attack your house. Here's how to make a bomb with household cleaning supplies..."