The Difference Between a Freshman and a Senior

After four years in college, some things tend to change.

1. Page limits -

• Freshman year: You think the professor is trying to teach you to write more concisely. 

• Senior year: You realize the prof is thinking, "If I have to grade 120 papers, then I better make sure they aren't too long." 

2. Food - 

• Freshman year: You hunt around the cafeteria to find something you want to eat--you may even get in the grill line and cook some stir-fry. 

• Senior year:  If acquiring a particular food requires significant effort or waiting in a line, you just default to cereal or pizza.

3. Physical fitness - 

• Freshman year: "Wow, what a nice gym! I'm definitely going to work out all the time while I'm at school." 

• Senior year: You visited the gym enough times to fulfill your phys. ed. requirement. 

4. Wardrobe -

• Freshman year (female): You try to look cute most days. Outfits often include include coordinated jewelry and accessories.

• Senior year (female): Well, it's on your floor and it doesn't smell. If you throw a scarf on with it, it'll look half decent. 

• Freshman year (male): You put on clothes and went to class. 

• Senior year (male): You put on clothes and went to class. 

5. Friends -  

• Freshman year: Everyone you met was a potential friend. You tried to be best buddies with everyone. 

• Senior year:  You only make friends with classmates in case you need notes from them later in the semester. You have a core group of similarly undermotivated senior friends (and a few cool juniors if they're lucky).

6. Personal Cleanliness and Hygiene 

• Freshman year: You did your laundry regularly. You changed your sheets at least once a semester. You were careful not to touch anything in the shower. 

• Senior year: It's possible that half your laundry is in that pile of unclaimed items in the laundry room. Changing sheets happened after graduation when you were packing up to leave. The strange arrangements of hair on the side of the shower stall no longer scare you. 

7. Roommates

• Freshman year: you were careful to change discreetly, possibly doing it in the bathroom after showering. 

• Senior year: Your roommate has seen your butt several times and you no longer care. 

8. Homework -  

• Freshman year:  
• Worrying about deadlines, writing down all assignments in a planner which you check regularly
• Taking notes on every living, breathing thing your professor says
• Paying attention in class
• Asking questions of intricate minutia regarding the requirements for assignments.

• Senior year: 
• You figure you'll hear about most major assignments before they're actually due. 
• Notes consist of, "Prof said X, Y, & Z will be on the test"
• Only listening in class if a) the class is hard or b) if the professor sounds like he's saying something important.
• Rarely asking questions about assignments--if you write it 12 pt. Times New Roman with 1" margins (and a half-hearted attempt at either MLA or APA formatting), you'll be fine. 

Dedicated to all my many friends from Cedarville. I'm so thankful I got to take the journey from perky freshman to chill senior with such a wonderful group of people. I love and miss you all! 

Bathtubs: The Newer, Better Under-the-Bed

Gone are the days of stuffing your messy belongings under the bed. 

In those harrowing 5 minutes before guests arrive, stashing and storing your various unsightly belongings can cause real panic. When the carpet is hidden from view but you need a quick clean-up, where are today's humans going to stash their stuff? According to a recent study by the Institute for #Adulting, your bathtub is actually an excellent place to throw your mess when you don't have time to clean. 

Preschooler Talk

"The bears were flying along and then...they just died!"

"I'm sorry" "I forgive you." "That's right! You do forgive me!"

"Nora, you are beau-u-u-tiful!"

"I've got it! We have to step on mosquitoes to stop them and turn them into butterflies!"

"I got you a flower soooo, you can marry me now."

"Let's play the dead squirrel game!"

"Noah what do you wanna be when you grow up?
N: I want to be a super ninja who rescues squirrels!
M: Oh...hmmm...ok....Well, why do you want to be that? What do the squirrels need to be saved from?
N: I don't know--sometimes they just need me to rescue them! like this! "hi-yah, swish, punch, take that!"
m: Who's going to pay you?
 *silence*
N: I think maybe I'll be a fireman.

Friends! No sniffing each other's peanut butter!

Camp: An Old Journal Entry

One week can seem like an eternity—especially when you have a test on Friday. A week can also seem like a mere moment—especially when you are with people you love, doing things that you enjoy. But sometimes, a week can seem like both an eternity and still not long enough of an eternity to accomplish what you had hoped.

That is how I felt this past week.

I spent the last seven days counseling at Camp Koinōnia . Koinōnia is the Greek word for “fellowship” or “community,” and that is what we try to build during camp week. The campers range from 3^rd to 5^th grade, from ages seven to eleven. They also range in spiritual knowledge from the Sunday school smart aleck to the completely un-churched. Their socioeconomic status go from girls who brought two outfits—the only ones they owned—to girls who told me they got their hair high-lighted…every month. And yet somehow, they tell us, we are to make a community, a Koinōnia, out of this peculiar gathering of children.

And so, my co-counselor Cari and I do our best to unite this group of young girls. Not only that, but we strive to provide emotional and spiritual support, and share the gospel effectively. It is a huge mission and we only have a week to accomplish it.

1.     Create Koinōnia – Working on it…

2.     Support emotional and spiritual needs

Mariah* had huge burn marks down the backs of her legs. A large bruise in the shape of an adult hand loomed ugly and purple beneath the smooth, childlike skin on her thigh. A wound on her forehead and scars on her back fixed my conviction that my camper was a victim of abuse. It broke my heart. Mariah also had many behavioral and relational issues. Not only was she abused, she was also my cabin’s “problem child”—for some reason, I am attracted to troubled kids. There’s something frustrating yet intriguing to me about figuring out what motivates their actions. The insatiable drive to figure them out is rewarded, however rarely, by an infinitely satisfying feeling of helping fix what is broken inside of them.

But the process is long and hard.

Most days at camp, I feel so discouraged. After all, what can one week do in the life of a girl who probably only hears about Jesus a few times a year? Can you even begin to heal the hurt of abuse? Even if the child does improve, is there any chance it will last once they go home?

1.     Create Koinōnia– Working on it…next?

2.     Support emotional and spiritual needs – trying, but feel discouraged. Next?

3.     Share the Gospel effectively.

Last year, I wasn’t able to counsel at camp. But I still heard stories. It was a memorable year because, for the first time, a camper was sent home. Why? She punched another girl, declaring she “wasn’t and never would be sorry.”

I came to find out that this camper was Loretta*, one of my campers from a few years back. The year she was in my cabin, she supposedly gave her life to the Lord and got baptized in the camp pool—apparently it was merely an emotional response to the setting sun, soft music, stirring testimony, quiet sniffles, and flowing tears of counselors and campers alike.

A sad sort of horror hung around my heart when I heard about Loretta. I questioned whether it was possible for kids that young to be saved: was it possible for them to understand the Gospel? I questioned my abilities: did I explain the message of salvation poorly? I questioned my own knowledge: did I even know what the gospel was?

In the end, I learned that sometimes all you can do is love them and hope that someday they'll associate that love with the love of Christ. 

By the end of the week, my list reads:

1.     Create Koinōnia– Working on it…next?

2.     Support emotional and spiritual needs – trying, but feel discouraged. Next?

3.     Share the Gospel effectively.

1. Love them like Christ loves you

Lyrics to Contemplate: Go

Go

Sandra McCracken

Listen when you first wake,
your compass aligns
to the sounds of the morning
thoughts like tiny earthquakes
alive in your head
a light and a warning

Cartographic lines within your veins
following the sky’s endless terrain
see what you’re made of…

Go, on your own
go when you’re ready
brave girl you are smart
go when your heart is strong and is steady 

Diamonds are your words, babe,
Speak them slow, the wisdom is coming
Sure, the steps that you take
in sorrow and hope, your beauty becoming
Fire cannot burn the same place twice
lean toward the Day that breaks the night
so go and find out…

Go, on your own
go when you’re ready
Brave girl you are smart
go when your heart is strong and is steady

Hush the noises, hush your doubt
find your courage, draw it out
See a lantern just ahead, see the pillar glowing red and
Go, go if you want

go, on your own
go when you’re ready
brave girl you are smart
go when your heart is strong and is steady

For a free download of this song, click here

Adventures in Ameteur Photography

Thank you to Kendall and Georgie for posing as my beautiful models and helping take pictures!

Sisters

Sunlight #1

Sunlight #2 - love the colors on this one!

She's so beautiful!!

Kendall actually MADE the dress I'm wearing

My favorite!

Fun playing with Georgia

Why I Continue to Believe that Christ is Worth It

(This post is an excerpt from a paper I wrote last semester). 

          Perhaps you are wondering what the catch is, “Christianity cannot be that easy! I know that when you become a Christian you have to give up all sorts of things and follow all these rules. God has so many expectations.” Christianity may appear that way at first, but becoming a Christian is very different than this dismal picture. On first glance, it may seem difficult, but a closer examination reveals that Christ is the real treasure you've been searching for your entire life. 
                 Perhaps a story will make my point.  Once, Mommy and I were in the car—a question weighed on my 8-year-old heart and after a long contemplation, I finally asked, “Mommy, will Jesus bring my dollhouse to heaven?” 
             Mom raised an eyebrow,  “I don’t think so, Lynley. Why do you ask?”

            “Well, I’m not sure if I want to go to heaven if my dollhouse isn’t there. I would miss it. I really like playing with my dollhouse—it’s my favorite toy.” Mommy explained that I would not miss my dollhouse when I got to heaven because I would have Jesus. I remained skeptical, of course. How could I ever be happy without my dollhouse?
            Of course, we all laugh now because I have grown up. I no longer think I will miss my dollhouse in heaven, because I have outgrown my need for it—but at that time, my dollhouse was of great importance to me. Why? Because the pleasure I derived from the toy was immediate; it was right before me and instantly provided joy, entertainment, or an escape from the “hard stuff” (i.e. chores). At that age, I knew nothing of how I’d feel grown up—that I wouldn’t miss my dollhouse because I would be enlightened to all sorts of new things that were better than dollhouses.
              This mirrors how we relate to heaven and God. So often the phrase "pick up your cross" strikes terror into our hearts to think of losing or giving up the things that comfort us now. But this is because we are, in a way, children. We do not understand everything right now; we see only what is right before us. We cannot imagine life without our pitiful toys.
               But then God calls to us, telling us there is more to life than we presently see. “You will understand someday,” he tells us, “but until then, you will just have to trust that what I say is true. You won’t miss your old way of life once you grow-up spiritually.” If we believe and trust God, we will begin to grow up, and only gradually will we see why the dollhouse was no big deal. There are a lot of “dollhouses” in our lives that we do not want to give up because they seem necessary to our happiness—what we fail to see is that if we say “yes” to Jesus and learn to spend less time on the immediate pleasures around us, we will start to grow up. And once we’ve “grown up,” we’ll have a good laugh with Jesus remembering the time when we thought we needed those things to be happy.

ADHD Devotionals

There's very little sacred space
in this place, this head that
never stops turning. Churning,
always churning out a flutter of new thoughts,
none of which quite makes it
to the top
before I stop to smell a new flower,
and check an old box,
and chase after that thought I lost yesterday
in the usual way.

So Jesus, take this space,
this place,
this mind--
take my sacred space and time,
because they aren't truly
mine.

Thank You, Professor

The ever-enlightening wisdom bestowed upon me by professors :) 

"We're not trees, we're not roaches, we're not chairs--sorry for those of you who thought you were." - Dr. Becknell

"I would make a very attractive woman." - Dr. Becknell

"Oh no! This isn't a word document...I can't edit it...the administrative assistant PDF-ed it!" - Dr. Dolph 

"I used to write the number 9 on everything--eventually my mother said, 'No more nines!!'" - Dr. Becknell

"Freud said our thinking oozes from every pore. The question is, what are you oozing?" - Dr. Becknell

Slices of Life

A few snapshots that remind me how funny life can be.

Next time you think you're hungry, remember this desperate squirrel.

Adding new meaning to the phrase "pray continually."
Also, apparently there's a Constitutional amendment declaring a new "right" I wasn't aware of...

...claims the book written by two men....

Dinner of mashed potatoes & french toast sticks? We call this "The Freshman 15 Meal"

...never thought about that one!

Questionable Theology (Part 4)

And now for the fourth installment of this semester's "Joys of Grading" series:

My all-time favorite quote from this semester:
"Conversion is the starting point of this journey; it is the "death of the old person" and the "birth of the new" person. This is not say that there are two different souls dwelling inside a person like a 'white dog' and a 'black dog.'" 

"We are to blindly follow and obey wherever he leads us." 

"As it says in 1 Thes. 4:2 'this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from fortification.'" 

“In general people have a very easy role in conversion. All they have to do is, well, nothing really.”

"Conversion is an instantaneous miracle. It is something that hits you suddenly and you feel and believe your sins and they look very real to you." 

"Through this I hope to constantly remind myself of what it means to be a disciple and examine my faith. At the end if I find myself to be a Christian, I will be successful." 

"Spiritual formation is not something that can't be measured by human means. To ask 'how much' spiritual formation can be obtained is similar asking how much marriage can be obtained in this life....Rather, spiritual formation is a tapestry consisting of different rates, different 'colors' etc."

"A bad example of faith that I can think of is the wind. We cannot see it, but we can see the effects of it. And we also can hear, smell, taste, and feel it, which is why I said it was a bad example. Another example that I've heard before involves a chair..." Oh brother.

"This world is still broken, and even though people don't in sin anymore, they still stumble into it." 

Did you like what you read?
Read part 1 here.
Read part 2 here.
Read part 3 here.

Tell Me How

A poem for those who went before me. 

*     *     *     *     *

Tell me how to know this bundle of firing neurons, 
when people keep trying to rewire me.

Tell me how to survive the “culture wars,” 
when I refuse to choose one side.

Tell me how to fit somewhere,
when I’m a piece from a different puzzle.

Tell me how to hope so heavy,
when hopeful heavy hearts live painful.

Tell me flesh and blood has walked here before, 
Tell me your story built with tear-soaked mortar.
Tell me how the curtain tore,
Tell me what the hell I’m living for.

Because if you don’t I might give up.

My only fear is that if
I give up,
I won’t be able to
tell the next me how I got 
here.

An afterthought:

Then I passed by and saw you kicking about in your own blood,

and as you lay there in your blood,

I said to you,

‘Live!’ 

Break-Up Recovery Kit

Most of us have broken up with a boy at least once in our lives. It's sad, painful, and utterly heart-wrenching. Breaking up leaves you practically senseless.

That's why you really need the new break up recovery kit! Say goodbye to the conventional break-up routines of crying on a friend's shoulder, eating chocolate (and/or an entire carton of ice cream), and going through a box of tissues in a few hours. This new break-up recovery kit has everything you need from a male candle (because you know you want to burn their head off) and female candle (for who knows why) all the way to helpful therapeutic modalities such as Separation Oil, Break-Up Incense, and "Keep Away Enemies" Soap. 

Instructions for use: 

1. Begin burning the male/female candle (guy if you're a girl and vice versa if you're a guy). Feel free to carve your ex's name into the candle for greater effect. 
2. Take the remaining candle and turn it to face the burning candle. They can watch. 
3. Separation Oil - pour all over body. If your ex tries to catch you, you'll slip right out of his fingers. 
4. Break-up Incense - burn regularly. The stench will prevent any man from coming near you for a very long time. 
5. Keep Away Enemies Soap - Wave this soap in front of all enemies and they will magically be "washed away."

You can have all this and more for the great price of $39.99! And yes, this kit is actually available for purchasing here!