Wednesday, December 18, 2013

The Joys of a Student Grader

When asked to create a plan for spiritual development: 
"Beginning in December, I will ponder my contributions to the kingdom of God."

When asked what God's role in spiritual formation was...
"Our spiritual formation is formed around God."

When asked what happens internally to a person engaged in spiritual formation...
"A person engaged in spiritual formation changes internally."

No, really??
"Before conversion can even happen, there needs to be a person who can be converted, which implies one role of a person in conversion; they are necessary.

How is this for a concluding sentence?
"So many ways I could work on my spiritual formation and grow in my knowledge and understanding of the lord."

 The Yoga Teacher:
"The Holy Spirit will even provide you a way out you just have to feel, listen, or look for it."  Namaste.

The Dentist: 
"An individual in this life is imperfect. There may be thousands of shades of imperfection, and an individual can try to move a few shades up or down (like using the teeth whitening strip).

The Manly-Man:
"The goal of spiritual formation, at it's root, is to develop such a strong relationship with Christ that we make him our best friend. I don't mean this in a corny way, so don't imagine someone who snuggles with his Bible."

The Toddler:
"I am only a child, so I'm used to having quiet time whenever I want, so having a roommate makes this more difficult.

The Swimmer: 
"I want to make a daily practice of really diving and using the tools I learned this semester to more fully understand God's word applied in my life."

The Pharisee in-the-making: 
"Why did I [say "believe in your heart"] and skip confess with your mouth? Because if a person is deaf they can still be converted even though they cannot say it with their mouth."

Choose and convert ALL the people! 
"God's role in conversion is complete,  full, and literally all of conversion is from God. He even chooses those that will choose him, because if someone chooses him then they could boast."

God: the seventh member of the avengers
"Trusting in God also is [a] way to learn about God and what his powers are."

The role of the toilet in spiritual formation: 
"In attempts to bring the discipline of confession more fully into my life, I will meet with a close friend to relieve myself of the burden of certain sins."

"I think James says it so well when he says..."  A.K.A. I don't want to explain this, so I will just quote scripture.

Sounds strangely familiar...
"For God to put a fire in me for him that I can't contain and can't control." * 

Harry Potter meets Cedarville: 
"I have access to feedback and I have somewhat of an input and I will use my potion help the new church grow." 

Winners for Best Typos

"However there is more to spiritual formation than simply eating rid of our human nature."

"As we become spiritually formed, God constantly provides us with grade and redeems us from our sins."  

"The believer's role in spiritual formation is to peruse the Lord with all of their heart."

Other spiritually enlightening thoughts...

"In conversion of themselves they need to start living for God."

"Believers may be very smart and try to follow God but everyone is not perfect. We do things like be mean, rude, or non-holy." 

"[The gospel] is supposed to teach wisdom and has songs to praise God with."

"In other words, spiritual formation kind of works like a plant...that sounds a little stupid but it makes some sense."

Apparently, someone agrees with plant-guy: 
"God desires for us to stay close to him saying that if we grow apart we will end up weathering and dying."

"Matthew six is a treasure trove of verses that advises Christians to abandon worry."

"Spiritual formation is a roller coaster process that supersedes the believers commitment and love for God."


Winners for questionable grammar and most confusing sentences:  

"This verse (John 3:16) describes the acts of Jesus who gave us a blueprint so as how to live a G0d-oriented life from the point of redemption through death of this life.

"The gospel is the books given to the believers to help us follow him by the stories and adventures the people of the Bible had."

"Also faith in works is where trusting God enough that when he tells us to do something in his way, we do it, the way God wants us to."

"Also it is evident in Galatians 6:8 that sows their own flesh are corruption and sowing for spirit and will have a eternal life."

"Explains the aiding process in which we are supposed to do."

"Knowing this we have to determine the meaning through other applications and figure out the meaning of the application that can be used."

"Luke 13:5 says, '...unless you repent you too will perish.' and makes that this too is also a necessary part of conversion, to turn from our old life to a new life with Christ as the Lord of our lives."

"As Paul elaborate I can a struggle that I know I face, that Paul may have been hinting at."


Note: all typos in above sentences are original to the papers. 

*directly out of a Christian worship song called, "Set a Fire"

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