Break-Up Recovery Kit

Most of us have broken up with a boy at least once in our lives. It's sad, painful, and utterly heart-wrenching. Breaking up leaves you practically senseless.

That's why you really need the new break up recovery kit! Say goodbye to the conventional break-up routines of crying on a friend's shoulder, eating chocolate (and/or an entire carton of ice cream), and going through a box of tissues in a few hours. This new break-up recovery kit has everything you need from a male candle (because you know you want to burn their head off) and female candle (for who knows why) all the way to helpful therapeutic modalities such as Separation Oil, Break-Up Incense, and "Keep Away Enemies" Soap. 

Instructions for use: 

1. Begin burning the male/female candle (guy if you're a girl and vice versa if you're a guy). Feel free to carve your ex's name into the candle for greater effect. 
2. Take the remaining candle and turn it to face the burning candle. They can watch. 
3. Separation Oil - pour all over body. If your ex tries to catch you, you'll slip right out of his fingers. 
4. Break-up Incense - burn regularly. The stench will prevent any man from coming near you for a very long time. 
5. Keep Away Enemies Soap - Wave this soap in front of all enemies and they will magically be "washed away."

You can have all this and more for the great price of $39.99! And yes, this kit is actually available for purchasing here!