Trapped in Life

I wake up in the morning to the sound of my alarm. Worst sound in the world. Beep……….Beeep……….Beeeeep………BEEEEP…….…BEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!! I finally hit the snooze button only to be awakened by the same horrific noise five minutes later. As if the alarm clock isn’t enough, my mother comes in and reminds me in a very grumpy voice that if I’m not on time to school, she’s gonna take my cell phone away.

I finally get up and drag myself to the shower where I sit under the hot water feeling temporarily happy. It’s warm and comfortable, clean and quiet, so I am contented…that is until my mom marches into the bathroom and reminds me (again) not to be late for school and yells at me for wasting so much water.  Once I’m out of the steamy tub, the cheerful part of my day (aka. sleep and shower) are now over. 

My online writing class wants me to compose a paragraph on how I’m going to improve the second draft of my paper. The prompt? “Articulate your plans for revision.”

“Well, hmmm,” I muse to myself, “what could I say I’m going to do? Let’s see, could I say, ‘I’m just going to WRITE BETTER?!’” I don't really care about this assignment; it's only worth five points. Finally, after staring at a blank Word document for a while, I make up something about how I’m going to make my thesis more “clear and concise.”  It sounds nice and scholarly.

School drags on…I take a few unsanctioned breaks to get on Facebook, but for the most part, I work hard. By the time evening approaches, I’m in a bad mood, I’m hungry, and all I want to do is watch a movie. My brother, in typical boy fashion, comes home from basket-ball practice sweaty and very smelly. He farts unabashedly as he passes me in the hall. My dad comes home from work and wants me to Iron his shirt, my mom wants me to empty the dishwasher, etc. etc. So much for my problems being over after school. I do the dishwasher, tell dad I have "too much school" to iron his shirt, and spray Febreze in the hall so it doesn’t smell like farts.

After dinner, I begin the unhappy task of homework. My studying goes somewhat along these lines:

I write a few sentences of my paper that’s due...tomorrow. I then experience a sudden urge to get on Facebook. I decide that I have writers block, and take a break. I flip to my FB homepage “Oh my goodness! She is in a relationship with him?!” I marvel momentarily at the little pink heart on my screen. Despite the fact that she goes to church, the guy she's dating isn't even a Christian--so unholy. How could my mom ever be mad at me when there are girls out there actually dating? Not just dating, dating non-Christians! 

My phone buzzes…it’s a text from a friend. My dad hears it from the other room and tells me that I treat my phone like heroine. “Lynley, you shouldn’t be texting so much on a school night,” he says. I don’t see how one text message is like doing heroine, but I put my phone on silent anyways, just to help my dad’s peace of mind.

By the time my homework is done—or at least by the time I’m tired of doing it—it is really getting late. My dad and brother are already in bed. I finally go up to my room where I search through piles of clothes to find my PJs. My mom walks by and begs me to clean up my "pig stye" of a room. I sigh and roll my eyes, not bothering to say anything. My room is always a mess, because I am too busy applying to college! What can't she just get used to it?

By the time I get in bed I feel too tired to pray or read my bible. God will have to wait for the weekend. I'm too tired, my life is too hard, I have too much homework, my parent's expect too much, I never get a break... Finally, I drift off into an uneasy sleep. 

About 6 hours later, I wake up to the sound of my alarm. Worst sound in the world. Beep……….Beeep……….Beeeeep………BEEEEP…….…BEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!! I finally hit the snooze button only to be awakened by the same horrific noise five minutes later. As if the alarm clock isn’t enough, my mother comes in and reminds me that if I'm not on time to school she is going to...

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Sound familiar? Sometimes I feel like my life is just a meaningless circle of events; I live the same meaningless life, doing the same meaningless things, for the same meaningless reasons. If you're a human, I'm sure you have felt this way before too. But perhaps, the answer is not so hard to find as it seems.

Have you read your Bible lately?

How's your prayer life?

Do you have purposeful goals?

Are you listening to the Holy Spirit?

I think my life would be much more meaningful if I were honest enough with myself to answer those questions on a daily basis. What about you? Is your life meaningful or meaningless? I believe we have the decision to choose which we will embrace, and with the power of Christ in us, it will prove a less strenuous task than it sometimes appears.