Amusing Mr. Milliman Quotes

This is why I have the best spiritual formation teacher! Have fun reading!

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(there was a rather large crash outside of our classroom, and it almost sounded like a gunshot)

"Come on in, we'll teach you about pacifism."

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Dr. Hutchison Quote of the day!

I have a chemistry professor named Dr. Hutchison. He is a wonderful teacher and chemist, but in addition to these accomplishments, I believe he possess one other talent: a comedian. Thus, I have decided to post his most famously funny quotes.

"I guess I shouldn't be telling you about this. But then again, you'll be prepared if terrorists ever come and attack your house. Here's how to make a bomb with household cleaning supplies..."

My mother always warned me about this day...

Like most children, I always said I'd never be like my parents. I'd never have those annoying parental idiosyncrasies around MY children. And surely, I'd never care about keeping anything clean. Or perhaps not...

My mother would faint if she read these.

The (slightly morbid) Hobby of Writing Poetry

I have a mind to know,

what fate doth seal my lover.

Where destiny hath taken, 

her slender figure and light feet.

Does she sleep upon the moor, 

lying in purple clumps of heather,

her chestnut hair caressing fair skin, 

lying pallid and cold by the turns of the weather?

You Know It's Midterms When...

As a college student, I am learning that midterms mean a whole new way of life. You know it's midterms when...

1.  There are post-it notes stuck to everything
2. Your hand hurts from writing flash-cards
3. The words "Going to fail..." have come out of your mouth an uncanny number of times in the past few days.
4. You haven't changed clothes in 3 days

Chelsea and the Dress

The following post is a fun piece that I wrote last year for my old blog. Please enjoy!

Once upon a time there lived an extremely awkward, frizzy haired teenager named Chelsea Clinton. She was daughter of the renowned couple, Bill and Hillary Clinton. (Wonderful liberals!) Chelsea met a handsome young man named Marc Mezvinsky, son of Ed Mezvinsky who is more or less famous, due to also being a politician and serving prison time for charges of bank fraud. They were a picture of Democrat perfection! After breaking up in high school and then getting back together later in life, they decided to get engaged. Their recent marriage sealed the deal, but this love story didn't end in a splendid, fairytale wedding. The day they tied the knot had a few serious problems. The first of which is the wedding dress.

Early on in the paparazzi game, it was discovered that Miss Clinton intended to wear a gown by famous designer Vera Wang. (Although Chelsea did take great pains to hide herself.)

 

Trapped in Life

I wake up in the morning to the sound of my alarm. Worst sound in the world. Beep……….Beeep……….Beeeeep………BEEEEP…….…BEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!!!!! I finally hit the snooze button only to be awakened by the same horrific noise five minutes later. As if the alarm clock isn’t enough, my mother comes in and reminds me in a very grumpy voice that if I’m not on time to school, she’s gonna take my cell phone away.

I finally get up and drag myself to the shower where I sit under the hot water feeling temporarily happy. It’s warm and comfortable, clean and quiet, so I am contented…that is until my mom marches into the bathroom and reminds me (again) not to be late for school and yells at me for wasting so much water.  Once I’m out of the steamy tub, the cheerful part of my day (aka. sleep and shower) are now over.